feat: Phase 1 — extract the client (web SPA + desktop) to dtoro/oikos-web

Problem: the hexagonal refactor churns the backend tree for nine more
phases; the UI delivery stack (web/ SPA, cmd/desktop Wails wrapper,
compose/web image) must move to its own repo first so doc/layout
rewrites land once on a backend-only tree.

Change:
- New repo git.hubris.network/dtoro/oikos-web (v0.33.0): web/, desktop/
  (updateURL repointed to oikos-web releases), compose/, own CI (web +
  desktop jobs), own deploy script (CI-green gate, TOCTOU guard,
  version-tagged images, prune-to-3), own webhook receiver on :9798 +
  launchd unit, own compose project publishing the same 8091:80.
- Cutover executed on mac-mini in order: oikos stack's web service
  stopped+removed, oikos-web project brought up on 8091; outer Caddy
  untouched (targets the published port) — serving + Authentik flow +
  /wails 404 quirk verified post-cutover.
- Stripped from oikos: web/, cmd/desktop/, compose/web/, desktop CI
  workflow, ci.yml web job, Makefile ui/desktop/desktop-package/install
  targets, the compose web service, oikos-web from deploy.sh's fallback
  prune list; wails + go-keyring dropped from go.mod, vendor synced.
- README / CONTRIBUTING / AGENTS.md / .agents dev+operations docs now
  point at the new repo; mbse + mascot design docs carry a path note.

Risk: production SPA serving depends on the new pipeline now; rollback
is versioned-image re-up of the old web service from a pre-split
checkout (port 8091). Desktop builds installed before the split still
check dtoro/oikos releases — one manual reinstall, noted in the
oikos-web release notes.

Verification: go vet, make test (race), make generate-check, golangci
(no new findings; baseline down 400→365); post-cutover curls —
localhost:8091 200, /wails/runtime.js 404, outer Caddy 302 Authentik.

web/node_modules/events/tests/common.js

@@ -0,0 +1,104 @@
+// Copyright Joyent, Inc. and other Node contributors.
+//
+// Permission is hereby granted, free of charge, to any person obtaining a
+// copy of this software and associated documentation files (the
+// "Software"), to deal in the Software without restriction, including
+// without limitation the rights to use, copy, modify, merge, publish,
+// distribute, sublicense, and/or sell copies of the Software, and to permit
+// persons to whom the Software is furnished to do so, subject to the
+// following conditions:
+//
+// The above copyright notice and this permission notice shall be included
+// in all copies or substantial portions of the Software.
+//
+// THE SOFTWARE IS PROVIDED "AS IS", WITHOUT WARRANTY OF ANY KIND, EXPRESS
+// OR IMPLIED, INCLUDING BUT NOT LIMITED TO THE WARRANTIES OF
+// MERCHANTABILITY, FITNESS FOR A PARTICULAR PURPOSE AND NONINFRINGEMENT. IN
+// NO EVENT SHALL THE AUTHORS OR COPYRIGHT HOLDERS BE LIABLE FOR ANY CLAIM,
+// DAMAGES OR OTHER LIABILITY, WHETHER IN AN ACTION OF CONTRACT, TORT OR
+// OTHERWISE, ARISING FROM, OUT OF OR IN CONNECTION WITH THE SOFTWARE OR THE
+// USE OR OTHER DEALINGS IN THE SOFTWARE.
+
+var test = require('tape');
+var assert = require('assert');
+
+var noop = function() {};
+
+var mustCallChecks = [];
+
+function runCallChecks(exitCode) {
+  if (exitCode !== 0) return;
+
+  var failed = filter(mustCallChecks, function(context) {
+    if ('minimum' in context) {
+      context.messageSegment = 'at least ' + context.minimum;
+      return context.actual < context.minimum;
+    } else {
+      context.messageSegment = 'exactly ' + context.exact;
+      return context.actual !== context.exact;
+    }
+  });
+
+  for (var i = 0; i < failed.length; i++) {
+    var context = failed[i];
+    console.log('Mismatched %s function calls. Expected %s, actual %d.',
+        context.name,
+        context.messageSegment,
+        context.actual);
+    // IE8 has no .stack
+    if (context.stack) console.log(context.stack.split('\n').slice(2).join('\n'));
+  }
+
+  assert.strictEqual(failed.length, 0);
+}
+
+exports.mustCall = function(fn, exact) {
+  return _mustCallInner(fn, exact, 'exact');
+};
+
+function _mustCallInner(fn, criteria, field) {
+  if (typeof criteria == 'undefined') criteria = 1;
+
+  if (typeof fn === 'number') {
+    criteria = fn;
+    fn = noop;
+  } else if (fn === undefined) {
+    fn = noop;
+  }
+
+  if (typeof criteria !== 'number')
+    throw new TypeError('Invalid ' + field + ' value: ' + criteria);
+
+  var context = {
+    actual: 0,
+    stack: (new Error()).stack,
+    name: fn.name || '<anonymous>'
+  };
+
+  context[field] = criteria;
+
+  // add the exit listener only once to avoid listener leak warnings
+  if (mustCallChecks.length === 0) test.onFinish(function() { runCallChecks(0); });
+
+  mustCallChecks.push(context);
+
+  return function() {
+    context.actual++;
+    return fn.apply(this, arguments);
+  };
+}
+
+exports.mustNotCall = function(msg) {
+  return function mustNotCall() {
+    assert.fail(msg || 'function should not have been called');
+  };
+};
+
+function filter(arr, fn) {
+  if (arr.filter) return arr.filter(fn);
+  var filtered = [];
+  for (var i = 0; i < arr.length; i++) {
+    if (fn(arr[i], i, arr)) filtered.push(arr[i]);
+  }
+  return filtered
+}